my head feels horrible right now. I can't breath and my nose won't stop running. i need sleep, but can't sleep. I wish my honey was around for a snuggle.

Blog, Helloooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
my brain is in a constant fog of pressure and pain. My throat aches as my nose continues to run. I have mucus build up that sucks ASS. these are the worst freaking allergies I've ever experienced! i hate this. i think i might not even be horny.....just kidding.
I've finally accepted that I do not have a job and it might take sometime. this is not from a lack of trying though. My attitude has been good about it I think. I mean what can I do. this is out of my hands. this is the second time in my life that I've had this feeling. or maybe the third. I have fully moved in with Mel and Gin. I love it. I have gotten a million times better at just letting Mel be and have our own time. It's nice. Yes update Blog...I feel better about her everyday and look so forward to us getting our own place. We've both been talking about it and looking all week. I can't wait to come home to our place after work (yes I will have a job) and surprise her with a warm bubble bath and a glass of wine. then when she gets out I'll have dinner ready for her. I like doing things like that for her Blog, but you knew that.
We are 1 month until Mexico! how crazy is that. we started planning this in January! it will be our firdt real trip together. I'm all giddy thinking about it. Life sure is fun. It sure is nice right now typing this with a sense of calm, except the allergies!
Mel and I had dinner the other night with my folks and the conversation led in to Lindsay talk. I told my mom straight up that I don't want to hear about her anymore. I know it hurt her but it's what I need. I love parents and want to enjoy them and my time with them. I want them to get to know the one person who is so, so, so important to me. I know Mel knows a lot of how I feel about her, but I'm not sure if she's aware of how much I truly see a person in there that I don't think anyone else has ever seen, except her family of course. But she is such an awe inspiring beauty in every which way.
I have no appetite right now. I'm wah, but also so relaxed. talk about polar opposites!
I need to go now I want to look for some apartments and do a little job searching.

Melissa I look forward to all that is to come. we are strange creatures you and i, but I would want it know other way. you are my best friend!